Last night was CrAzY. I had a meeting with a client that took me far beyond my normal 'work day'. As an early riser, typically 5 AM, seven o'clock in the evening is near bedtime for me when I begin to wind down my day and snuggle into family evening activities.
I was wiped when I arrived home at nearly 8:00 PM. I rushed past the family to start dinner, sending apologies as I flew to the kitchen. I sank into my chair while the rice was cooking with a lame salty snack because I was SO far past my dinner point and I vegged.
During this time, I surfaced enough to engage the children in conversation, look over some of their accomplishments for the day and began to relax a little.
We had dinner and when it was over, I could scarcely remember the taste of my food.
Somewhere along the way, I had lost connection with my state of mindfulness and in really reviewing the course of events yesterday, I think I know precisely where it happened.
Yesterday morning, about 6:00 AM.
My body was especially fatigued when I rose for my morning practice and instead of allowing for more Yin postures, more breath work for stimulation and a grounding sort of wake-up flow, I pushed ahead. Sun Salutations and standing poses.
Sometimes, this sort of 'full steam ahead' approach works because my body just needs a boost but yesterday morning was different and I felt it...I knew it.
It wasn't a total bust. I had moments of mindfulness yesterday. Knowing I was to have a long day, I took the morning off and spent time at home. I enjoyed gardening with my children, blowing bubbles in the front yard and filling the bird feeders with seed, watching for their eager arrivals. I baked muffins and we ate them fresh from the oven.
My morning practice sets the tone for my day. It doesn't mean I can't change the course with awareness and intention because I absolutely can. However, yesterday morning, I yang-ed when I should have yin-ed.
Here's to a lesson learned.
I used to tell the children, when they learned something, regardless of what it was, even the tiniest smidgen of knowledge, that they grew a little inside...
Yes--that's the point.